Don’t Bite My Head Off

Something about this picture is bugging me. Just got this creeping feeling there’s more here than meets the eye. Maybe if I divide it insections? Nope. Ugh. This kind of failure just can’t fly. I guess I’ll just have to pray for forgiveness.

On second thought, never mind. I’m sure someone will jump in the comments to mantisplain.

A picture of three green berries hanging in a triangular formation looking like the head of a praying mantis. Antennae and outlines of head and foreleg have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "Mantis Dating Advice: Never lose your head over a pretty girl."

Supplies Party

Atten-tion!

The school year has been being waged for a week now, so it’s time for a status update from each of you.

Cadet Lunchowski?

Rectangular sandwich container lid with two "eye" spaces over one larger "mouth" space. Mustard is smeared over all spaces. Speech bubble says, "They're eating us alive out there, General!"

Hang in there, Man. Mustard your courage!

Botteli, Report.

Reusable water bottle seen from the top. Two rivets form eyes, the closing mechanism makes a mouth, and the handle looks like a jutting chin. Speech bubble says, "My troops are staying straw-ng, Sir!"

Now that’s more like it. Keep it cup, soldier!

What about you, Knapsacki?

Back pack with a silver decoration that looks like sunglasses is hanging on a hook. Mouth has been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "We've taken a beating, General, Sir. But we're hanging in there."

Excellent, Trooper.

Hear that, soldiers? We have this in the bag!

All right, Troops, there’s a long road ahead, but I know you’re up to the job. Stay sharp and stick to it.

Company…dismissed!

Alien Concept

This just in.

It’s being reported that aliens have begun an invasion of earth.

These creatures are tricky and excellent at camouflage, but we have a few photos.

This first one was spotted at a nearby swamp, prompting scientists to dub it “The Marsh-an.”

Morning glory flower with two vines that look like eye stalks. Eyeballs have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "Take me to your weeder."

This next one was spotted under water. Judging by its defiant attitude in mocking the photographer, it should definitely be considered an anemone to humankind.

Pink shaggy sea anemone that looks like it's sticking out a tongue. Eyeballs have been doodled in.
Thanks to LE Callard for spotting this one.

I’m not going to beat about the bush here: we are in danger.

Some aliens have even been spotted hiding close to people’s homes.

Shaggy bush in a planter box with round decorations that look like eyeballs. Speech bubble says, "E Tree phone home."

And, even worse, in playgrounds.

Playground equipment with colourful semi-spheres with two screws at the top that look like aliens. Speech bubble says, "We think playgrounds are out of this world!"
Photo submitted by MJ Blakely

We cannot let this slide!

If you spot an alien in your neighbourhood, do not approach. Give them space.

All sightings are to be reported to your local X-Files division.

I know this situation feel scary, folks, but if we all work together we can overcomet!

Sea-ing Faces

Ahem.

It has come to our attention that some visitors to the aquarium have been making fun of our majestic sea creatures.

Bottom view of a sting ray, whose nostrils look like eyes over a 'meh' mouth. Speech bubble says, "Ouch! That really stings!"

I will remind you that sharks and sting rays have their eyes on top of their heads. It is their nostrils that are located on the bottom.

They do not like being told they have “funny faces.”

Bottom of a shark's head. Nostils look like sad eyes over a sad mouth. Eyebrows have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "That makes me feel jaw-ful."

Sharks have excellent eyesight, so don’t think you can get away with mocking them.

Saw tooth shark with angry-looking nostrils "eyes" and mouth. Angry eyebrows have been doodled in. Speech bubble says, "I saw that!"

These are deadly sea creatures, folks. Trust me when I say you don’t want to make them angry.

Great White shark with angry nostril "eyes" and mouth full of teeth. Speech bubble says, "It's all fin and games until somebody loses an arm."

So, while I’m sure many of us have been gill-ty of this offense in the past, I hope that in the future, you’ll churn over a new leaf and treat these animals like the dignified and sofishticated creatures they are.